Date sent:        21 Mar 96 17:52:40 EST
From:             Leigh Smith <103407.1637@compuserve.com>
To:               Stefan Roth 
Subject:          Ugly truck/dog contest
Send reply to:    offroad@ai.gtri.gatech.edu

"The rusty bumpers will be dangling, archaic engines belching, dingy dashboard dice swinging and nasty mutts barking. A parade of the North's most repulsive trucks and dogs will straggle through Yellowknife Saturday, vying for the coveted first place in the Ugly Truck 'n Dog contest."
There are two categories, best northern truck and ugliest truck.
"Northern trucks are characterized by the stuff in the back- a couch for the dog, ice augers, snowmobile parts and so on."
"Prizes this year include a fly-in trip to a camp on Great Slave Lake [for best northern truck and ugly truck/dog combo], 400 litres of gas, a beerstarter kit, a new dog house and three 10 kilogram bags of dog food."

Last year's winner, Elizabeth Seale, will be driving her boss's 1977 ford pick-up accompanied by not one but two ugly dogs. "Last year we got extra points when our dog ran off the truck to attack a neighbor's dog, so we're hoping that the two dogs will go at in the back of the truck." "It's a real northern truck- there's a snowmobile in back, the bumper's held on with duct tape and it belches black smoke when you start it."
"Last year this guy had a wheel that didn't work- not just a flat tire or something but no wheel at all. He had three wheels and a big log- I guess it's ok as long as there's snow on the ground."
This is one event in the 42nd annual Caribou Carnival which draws people from all over the north, and this year the Discovery channel will be filming the event [might be worth watching!].
Apparently in this contest you don't win anything if you don't bribe the judges. "The tiebreaker involves smelling the contestants to see who has the most authentic odor."

Basic rules are: Best Northern- good stuff in back like ice auger, winch, antlers, gas cans, outboard motor, snowmobile parts, sand bags, rope, unpaid tickets, garbage on dash and gun racks help too.

Ugliest truck-could have different coloured fenders, unpainted body fill, dents, broken glass, different size tires, makes smoke when started [extra points for smoke all the time], fuzzy dice, noisy roof rack, rust, dirt or mud, etc.

Ugliest dog-could have bad breath, not had a bath recently [or ever], unpleasant tendencies, constant barking and general unkempt appearance.

The picture of last years winner looks like it would beat anything that 4-wheeler mag gets for it's ugly truck competition! It's a 70's ford 4x4 with moose horns on the cab [beer cans stuck on all the points], chains on the tires, saggy rear end and lots of junk! The engine smoke rules are a far cry from the California emissions laws, eh?

Hope you found this amusing. Straight outta the great white north- Leigh Smith.

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